Monday, June 2, 2008

The Meeting

The next morning I woke up excited, but hesitant. I was so excited to meet Danelle, but more cautious because I was so vulnerable- would this really be our chance to grow our family? Danelle called and asked if we minded meeting her closer to downtown, as she was with a friend staying at a hotel. We thought that was a bit odd, but being we were desperate to meet her, we invited the friend to join us, hopefully making Danelle feel a bit more comfortable.

Our first chance to see Danelle was at a hotel parking lot- the place where memories get made! Kidding... I remember the first thing I said to Felix, "she's really pretty!" and then he said something like he agreed. We got out and decided where to go for lunch.

They (Danelle and her best friend, Rachel) followed us in Rachel's car to El Torito and we sat down to have lunch. I was still so very nervous!! How do you start this kind of conversation?!? Somehow we figured it out. We showed them both pictures, told them about our lives, asked about theirs and genuinely got to know one another. Towards the end of lunch, Felix and I both told Danelle that if she would consider us in her adoption plan, we would be so grateful, and that we would love the opportunity to meet with her again, but to feel no pressure, regardless of her decision.

We walked out of the restaurant feeling great- but with an air of hesitation. It was so real, so close! She was an incredible woman- I couldn't believe how brave she would be to be able to do this. Not five minutes later Danelle called and made our dreams come true. Danelle told us that she felt very comfortable that her family knew of us, and that we were normal people, not strangers found via a random adoption agency. She told us that we were meant to parent this little miracle- I can't remember the rest of the trip- I think I was so beyond myself with excitement that the rest of our conversation became a blur. We called our family and gave them the update and immediately made appointments to get the ball rolling. Danelle thought she might be 2-3 months pregnant, so we were somewhat panicked that she would need to find a doctor and quickly. There was so much to think about- money, hospital, attorneys, her feelings, her health, her children, our families, our house- it's nuts! And so the journey continued...

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Sunday, June 1, 2008

Walgreens- The New Meeting Spot!

We finally had spoken with Danelle and agreed to meet near her home, an area we weren't very familiar with. We were so excited- I was so nervous- what should I say? What do I bring? Blair had told me that she was interested in seeing our home and our lives, so I made sure the scrapbooks were in the car. Felix suggested we bring the laptop, since it had all of the latest photos, so that too went into the vehicle. Everything was ready- except me! I couldn't decide what to wear. At first, Felix and I looked ridiculous, we were both wearing white shorts/capris and similar colored tops. We looked like a cult family! He changed, and I futzed with my hair- of course it never works when you need it to be just right.

Off we went- we were fairly late, Felix was mad at me the entire drive. It really was my fault- I took FOREVER to get ready. We finally made it to the Walgreen's and we waited.... and waited.... and waited.... and waited. Felix swore we had missed her because we were 10 minutes late. I would have thought she would have waited, but I was beginning to think Felix was right. We called the only number we had for her and kept getting the answering machine- no dice. Our meeting wasn't going to happen.

I tried to stay positive, thinking that if I crumbled, Felix would know how upset I was, and he would get upset too. I suggested that we have a nice lunch, and look at this in a positive light- perhaps this was a very difficult decision and she had second thoughts. We called and left her a message saying exactly that, and that we understood. We tried to make it a normal Sunday afternoon, but we couldn't get out of our funk. We came back home and moped some more.

Later that day our phone rang- it was her! She apologized profusely and said that she had overslept and was so sorry that we had missed each other. She asked if we'd be willing to meet her the next day. Again- we said yes, hoping for the best!

Felix's Perspective:
So we arrived late. to no fault of my own. This is my pet peeve. If we are going to tell someone to meet us at a certain time then we most certainly better be their to greet the person, on time. I was so nervous. What was this person going to think of us? We wanted everything to be perfect so that Danelle liked us enough to consider us the eventual parents to her unborn child. So when got to Walgreens and started to look around, we initially did not see anyone and I started to get really nervous that the girl would not show up. I kept pacing and as time went on my heart began to break a little more. We finally gave up after an hour. We went out to lunch and sat there totally depressed. I was distraught. I want to be a dad so bad and I feel that it will never happen. Life is not supposed to be like this and at the age of thirty two, I felt that I was running out of chances to become a dad. When we went home that day, I think we took a nap. This whole ordeal had taken so much out of us and we were both hurt. Then we got the call that she had overslept and wanted to meet us the next day and once again we were excited but very cautious.

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